I have a lot of dreams. I don’t mean the figurative kind–of which I also have plenty–but the literal kind, that come at night. I have a lot of nightmares too, depending on the day. And I find them all fascinating.
The things our minds can conjure up are nothing short of extraordinary. We bring together details that our conscious mind would never think of. We build worlds that reveal to us what we’re afraid of and what we yearn for. (That’s why I thought Inception was a really smart movie.) And we have the most vivid feelings possible. At least for me, there are feelings I get in my unconscious journeys that stick with me for days, sometimes weeks. I even have a few that have stuck with me for years and I can still remember instantly.
Karina Vega, the heroine in Healers, has a dream that’s been haunting her for years. A dream without an ending. The ending will come when she’s ready (and I won’t tell you when that is, you’ll have to read the book). Here is the dream that always leaves her anxious:
I am tiny, maybe four years old. I come out of the mansion and walk toward the vineyard, the green, damp grass tickling my bare feet. I see Grandpa Demetrio inspecting the vines with his friend Anton. If the rain doesn’t come soon, this crop is gone. We’ll have a hard time this fall. The fruit won’t be rich enough for a new Puertas vintage. If we settle for a cheaper blend and bring in grapes from the outside it will be hard to do any business; we’ll lose this year’s contracts. I can feel the sadness in my Grandpa’s voice. This vineyard is his life and legacy, the keeper of his dreams. Why wouldn’t rain come if he needs it? I lift my arms to the sky, look up at the snowy peaks, and think of big drops of fresh water pouring down and drenching everything and everyone. I remember the times when my older brother Jorge and I would run around in the rain, laughing and jumping in all the puddles. My grandparents would watch us from the porch, smiling, their love surrounding us like a bubble of warm light. Thunder and massive clouds break over the land. Somewhere between imagination and reality, the rain comes pouring down. My grandpa throws his hat high in the air and starts cheering. He turns around, sees me standing there with my arms lifted to the sky, and runs toward me, the happiest I’ve ever seen him. He twirls me in his arms and says… Nothing.